Saturday, March 28, 2009

Grasping or Letting Go

How interesting it is when God reminds us that he is in control. How we want to grasp on to things with ALL our might. And we do so using all our energy. That's what I've been doing. Holding on because if I let go then it wouldn't be how I desired. But I'm not only too tired to continue that, I finally surrender my will. Thy will be done.

Lord you have given me a friendship that I cherish so much. Help me to love as you desire. Help me to give my heart as you desire. Help me to be a friend.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Grace Filled?

How tender and receptive are we of God's grace? He desires us to live a vibrant life ... a life united to his powerful divine life. Do we allow ourselves to be filled with that grace or are we a cracked bowl existing only in a daze, a daze of bewilderment, a daze of confusion, a daze of loneliness or pain. Why don't we RUN to God's infinite power, strength, and peace, first allowing Him to heal us and make us anew and then be filled to the brim with his blessings and grace but not only that ... Lord pour into us so that your grace may overflow onto others around us.

Now let us not be mistaken ... the Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Should we not be thankful for both? What is God going to give you today? Hold out your begging bowl and let Him decide what you need or what you should do without.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


So often Christ asks us to abandon our will. Are we willing to let go of our own plans or desires? Why do we hold on so tightly? This life isn't ours to grasp to selfishly. Sure we can do that. We can fashion masks hiding our true self, build walls protecting our heart and be self seeking. But we weren't created for that. We were created to LOVE. Is it easy? No. Is it painless? No. Is it simple? Yes.

Ready to lay your heart on the line?

It will hurt.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Need a Lift?


Six year old Brandon decided one Saturday morning to fix his parents
pancakes. He found a big bowl and spoon, pulled a chair to the counter,
opened the cupboard and pulled out the heavy flour canister, spilling it on the floor. He scooped some of the flour into the bowl with his hands, mixed in most of a cup of milk and added some sugar, leaving a floury trail on the floor which by now had a few tracks left by his kitten.

Brandon was covered with flour and getting frustrated. He wanted this to be something very good for Mom and Dad, but it was getting very bad. He didn't know what to do next, whether to put it all into the oven or on the stove, and he didn't know how the stove worked!

Suddenly he saw his kitten licking from the bowl of mix and reached to push her away, knocking the egg carton to the floor. Frantically he tried to clean up this monumental mess but slipped on the eggs, getting his pajamas white and sticky. And just then he saw Dad standing at the door.

Big crocodile tears welled up in Brandon's eyes. All he'd wanted to do was make them proud. He was sure a scolding was coming, maybe even a spanking. But his father just watched him. Then, walking through the mess, he picked up his crying son, hugged him and loved him, getting his own pajamas white and sticky in the process.

That's how God deals with us. We try to do something good in life, but it turns into a mess. Our marriage gets all sticky or we insult a friend or we can't stand our job or our health goes sour. Sometimes we just stand there in tears because we can't think of anything else to do.

That's when God picks us up and loves us and forgives us, even though some of our mess gets all over Him. But just because we might mess up, we can't stop trying to "make pancakes," for God or for others. Sooner or later we'll get it right, and then they'll be glad we tried...

-- Author Unknown

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Grace Like Rain

What a rush of cleansing grace. I enjoyed something tonight which I haven't done in years. I went running in the rain. Now granted safety was somewhat of a concern but I knew I had to brave the occasional lighting and thunder as I drove home after working late. The streets were calling my name and the rain was pouring down. What a sense of freedom!

As I was out enjoying splashing in puddles and feeling the rain fall upon my face, I was reminded of the most dangerous thing I had ever done in my life. Granted it was definitely stupid but it also is one of the most exhilarating and enjoyable memories I have of my college days.

Back at K-State one night a group of friends and myself had gathered for an Ultimate Frisbee game at Old Stadium. What we weren't expecting was a severe thunderstorm lighting up the sky and crackling thunder overhead. But did that slow us down ... well only a couple times ... when the lighting crackles so loudly that everyone freezes and huddles closer to the ground yeah it makes you wonder how dumb you really are. Nevertheless, there is something to be said of the pouring down rain ... how beautiful, how refreshing, how magnificent it is.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Love Hurts

God has created us for joy.  He didn't create us for pain and misery.  Are we willing to turn to Him and receive His love?  Why doesn't that seem like enough sometimes?

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Blessed Assurance

I find myself pondering many things: things in my mind, things on my heart, and even questioning if God is speaking to me. We have so little assurance in this life. No assurance that the phone will ring as you hope to receive a call, no assurance that life will happen as though we desire, no assurance of anything on this earth, our only true assurance is that God is there waiting for us. Waiting for us to turn to Him and say: that's it ... it's yours, she's yours, I'm yours, I am nothing without you Lord.

What do we expect to give us joy in our lives? Our friends, the ability we have to run or dance, banana granola pancakes? Maybe we are not looking in the right place. But if God is giving me direction and leading my heart, do I trust what I'm now experiencing? Is this where he has led me?

I ponder the following quote tonight. May it give you hope and peace as it does me.

"I beg have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer..." -Rainer Maria Rilke

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Revel in the Unknown

I am reminded recently that life is full of questions. When I was young I assumed that I would someday know or figure out most of the answers. But now I realize that as I let my heart and mind be more and more reflective, sure I find answers but mostly I just find more questions.

Why does it bother us so to not have the answers? Life is not black and white. Should we not instead revel in this state of unknowing. Can we simply enjoy the journey, the pursuit of knowledge and understanding?

Sunday, March 1, 2009

The Alpha and The Omega

A beginning and an end ... not only is this the beginning of my blog, Lent has also just begun. And as I remind myself everyday at work, I must begin with the end in mind. Where do I want to be in 40 days? And in asking that question, I can now appropriately and successfully move onward.

Who is it that I want to be in merely a month from now? A loving son, a caring brother, a better uncle, a compassionate friend? Simply a better person? I suppose I could sit and write a list that feels as though it has no end or better yet, I can be a man of action. I could get off my lazy bum and seek out all those friendships that I let suffer. I could actually go visit my family! Maybe I'll just take 20 minutes out of the 40,320 minutes I have every month to write to my eldest sister. The possibilities are almost endless in this limited amount of time we have here in this world. So how are we going to spend our lives?

Are we going to live life fully. And yet not so full we forget the most important things to us? Have we forgotten or ever experienced the beauty of simplicity? Or have we just let some of the not-so-important things take priority? Most importantly, are we ready for the end? When our earthly journey comes to an end, will we be content with how we have lived? Or as Thoreau says, are we living a life of quiet desperation?